Upside world

Maybe I am getting the Benjamin Button syndrome, maybe I am going through midlife crisis or maybe I am simply seeing things.
You tell me why we live in an upside world and I promise to reward the person who gives me a convincing and reasonable answer.
This is what is bothering me:
I remember when my first daughter was born and I constantly wanted to hold her, touch her and did not even put her in her own room to sleep. As a matter of fact, I would bring her into our own bed, where she cuddled under my arm or simply slept on her fathers’ chest. It was the sweetest sight. Same thing happened with my second daughter. Of course everyone would keep telling me what a great mistake this was, that a child was supposed to sleep in its’ own bed, that I was spoiling my girls waaaay too much blah blah blah. So, I thought, okay, babies are supposed to sleep alone. Leaving their mothers warm body, with her heart beat in their ears and her voice surrounding them for nine months, now they are forced into clothes and are supposed to sleep in a bed far way from their mother. Baby monitors would substitute the mom’s ear. Now don’t get me wrong, I did not want to constantly walk around with my babies and be Mrs. Mom in person.
When the kids become teenagers and want to be left alone, we parents become somehow stalkers. Be honest, if you have children, who are passed that age, you know what I mean. We constantly ask them what was going on at school, check their bags, under their beds, we are supposed to spend time with them. But we don’t get it: they don’t want to spend time with us. Hellloooo, we are the parents. Meaning we have nooo idea! About anything.
Then when people grow up and end up in a relation ship, they sleep mostly likely in one bed again. And here is my issue. I will ask you a question, but you have to promise me to be honest when you are answering. In case you are in a relation-ship and your partner does sleep in the same bed, how many times has it happened that you wished you were alone in the room? Someone might want to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, or get a glass of water. Someone likes the room warm, the other one cool. One of you might need to get up very early in the morning, the other one might be a night person. Every move in your own bed, becomes a torture. You constantly have to worry about waking the other one up. So, here the second part of my question: why? Why do grown-ups, who, yes, we might like all that touchy-feely stuff as well, but mostly we need a good sleep to be able to function the following day in a meeting, or during the commute or etc etc. etc. Now don’t give me the answer that this is just the way it is or it’s like this for sex. I would be very disappointed in your intelligence. If you have smaller kids in the house, you will be too tired for having sexual activities and too worried, locking doors, making sure no one wakes up and all the of the above, so that it will ruin the mood anyways. If you have grown-up kids who are either very independent or don’t live in your house anymore, most of the time, people forgot how it is to be very close, since they are pre-occupied with other things in their life.
Well, having said all of this might make you wonder. Now here is my solution:
I personally think we should have it the other way around. Holding a baby in the arm while it sleeps, and as grow-ups living like the aristocrat families of the last century. One was married, but basically lived separate in the same house in two different bed-rooms. No wonder the divorce rates were much lower at those times. It is not because people could not get a divorce, but probably because they had their own life anyway, even when they had a spouse. So, in my opinion, instead of putting a baby alone in a cold room, a grow-up should move in alone. You will have your spouse and a good night sleep.

Same sex relation-ships

It is terrible enough that people have to defend their sexual orientation. I believe what people do and think in their bedrooms is a very private matter and should stay between the two people involved. Whether a man is making love to a woman or to a man is only their business and should not be discussed publicly. Worse than discussing it is when other’s judge you based on your bedroom actions and interest.
I am straight and have not discovered any interests for my own gender yet. So I am not speaking out of self –interest. However, I do have some gay friends, who are a man or woman’s dream come true. Yes, I know as a woman we always think, well, maybe they have not met the right woman yet. Maybe I can “change” them. Or we think what a waste, I would love him. But ladies, think of it this way: imagine someone like Giselle Bundchen being a lesbian and falling in love with you. Would you change? She is gorgeous, rich and famous, has probably one of the best bodies. But, honestly, I would befriend her, but not want to be with her. Even if I am always bashing men, I admit, I rather have a man in my private rooms.
Now, you might say, it is easy for me to talk this way, because I don’t have a son or daughter who is gay or lesbian. Good point. I have thought how my reaction would be. Sure enough, I am liberal. But I think the first reaction would be: “What did I do wrong?” This is a question a mother always asks when her children do something unexpected. Unexpected- because you expect after giving birth to a son or daughter that they will end up marrying or being with someone from the opposite sex and have children. The latter one is probably one of the biggest reasons we might get the first reaction: we will not have grandchildren from this particular child. (Which is not 100 % true, but that its another story…). But what would I do after the first reaction passed? I guess I would think: “O.K., what now?” I would sit my son or daughter down and ask why they would know, how they found out… again all the mom questions. And eventually I would be fine. Because: What is wrong with it?
Think of another scenario: How would you react if your son or daughter came home one day and claimed to have been sleeping with 5 women or men every night for the past 4 years??? Don’t tell me you would say: Wonderful! That would be the greatest shock for me. At that point I would wonder: What did I do wrong?
Unfortunately, we live in a society, where people forget to think at times. When children (yes, 14 year olds are kids in my eyes) say publicly in Middle School: “Ughhh, so-and-so is gay… how disgusting!”, while they are talking about a grown-up man, while they are already sexually active themselves ever since they were 12. I ask you: why is it okay if a man sleeps around, but not okay if he is faithful to one male partner? Why do we call it sexual freedom for women, if they can have as many partners as possible, but not okay when a woman is faithful to her one female partner? I just don’t get it! We are constantly fighting for freedom of speech, expression and all that stuff. But gays and lesbians still have to fight for their right to be accepted as couples. Come on, it’s time for all of us to accept that a couple does not mean + and- only, that it can be + and + or – and -. As long as they get along, what do we care?

And admit: you don’t raise anyone gay or lesbian, they don’t make themselves gay or lesbians. To all those highly religious people, God made them this way. And if you go to church, mosque or synagogue and pray for all the people in this world, for all the creatures made by God, learn to accept gays or lesbians as well. They are the way they are. Just live with it!